Tuesday, December 16, 2008

2-Fer Tuesday Post #2

Well, I'm kind of curious about y'all.

Yeah, I said "y'all".

Sue me, some of my family have spoken like that for years, and there are some "country" phrases that just say it all, so there!

Anyway, back to my question..

Do you look forward to, or do you fear, the company Christmas dinner/party/whathaveyou.

Me? I can't stand it.


Because we've got an absolutely CLUELESS HR person, and she doesn't understand a thing about the employees.

Each and every single function we've done these past 5 years has been a complete and total FLOP.

She picks events, food, entertainment et all to her personal preferences, and not to the general consensus.

If she wanted to do something like that, why not put on her OWN party, and invite us over? Don't use the company money and time to make the associates grumble and gripe over what they're not getting, and how silly the theme is, or anything of that nature..

I'll give you a couple of examples of her style.

First, we've got the company gift-giving process we do each year.

Before we even got started on this, the warehouse personnel decided to save up funds to help the "Make A Wish" program for kids with, or recovering from, cancer.

What this program does is give the child, and their close family, the chance for a vacation of a lifetime. The only request from the foundation? $5000 for each child you want to try to sponsor.

If your facility is able to make that goal, you get to "adopt" a child's family, and you usually will get a visit from them once the trip is over.

If you make more than that, but less than enough for a second child, then the extra is put into a pool fund to help out causes who are falling short.

The last 4 years our facility has been able to support 4-5 kids per year. That's between 20-25k a year to a charitable cause.

This last year? She stopped it. When questioned why, her answer was this:

"I feel that we're putting WAY too much funding towards these kids, and not enough of it towards our own goals."

Translated, it means that she was hoping that the cash that we'd generate for the kids would then be diverted towards her coffers, where she could delegate the spending.

Sad to say that this year's Christmas gifts are going to seriously be lacking compared to the last few years. All because of some selfish reasoning.

Another example is the picnic we tried to plan for this year.

We tend to try to take pride in being a family-oriented business. Healthcare is paid for in full by the company, and that policy is blanketed to cover not only the associate, but his entire family of dependants as well.

Because of the family focus we have, the picnic planners decided to try to hold a carnival-type of cookout. Hamburgers, Hot Dogs, Corn Dogs, Fries, Pizza, Clowns, a couple of trick pets, and some games were in the works.

Enter in Ms. HR.

The picnic ended up like some kind of school fair, with cash being REQUIRED to be able to play the games.

What kind of games?

A cakewalk, that cost $5 per entry. It made exactly $0.

A water balloon toss. $2 per entry. It made $4.

A "Dunk the manager" contest. $1 per entry. This made $10.

No clown. No pets. No bounce house. No fair or circus-type of attitude anywhere.

Only 25 out of 300 employees showed up for it, once it was announced that games would cost cash to play.

There were 20 gifts to be awarded, and 10 were returned because they were things like $1 sun visors, or Water bottles that could be bought for less than $.50 each.

Needless to say, there were plenty of outraged folks over this.

And now we're hearing the plans for the "banquet" we're supposed to be having for this Christmas dinner.

Are we having anything traditional?


Chinese Take-out is the menu.

Sure, it's being catered. However, Chinese food for a CHRISTMAS dinner?

Where's the ham? Roast Beef? Turkey? Mashed potatoes?

Wherever it is, I know you're not going to find it at my dinner.

And the prizes?

Well, like I said, 300 employees, and there's only 15 gifts to be given out.

Odds are that there are going to be some serious rumblings about that one.

Oh, and also add to that the news that the Christmas bonus program that everyone looks forward to this year has been decided upon (by HR) to be diverted towards a disaster relief program for this area in case of flooding or severe weather.

Last time there was something that severe around here, the employer I work for was just buying their first storefront back East!

That was 35 years ago!

So yeah, I'm pissed, I'm disgruntled, and I know that I'm going to hear about it from other workers.

What can I do about it?

Well, you're reading it.

Hope yours isn't as bad as mine's going to be!


Dana said...

YIKES! Makes my employer look angelic!

Catherinette Singleton said...

Holy crap. I thought our company parties sucked. She sounds like she needs a kick in the pants. No wonder you don't like your parties. Ours seem like an f'ing pleasure compared to yours.

Jaime said...

chinese takeout happens to be my christmas every year! chinese and a movie because that's the only stuff open for those of us who don't celebrate xmas...

i haven't been to my office's holiday party in 2 years. it wasn't that great when i did go. the food is typically pretty bad and the music is worse. and with the economy the way it is, open bar now only lasts through the cocktail hour.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like my 20th high school class reunion. Our class president made us play games that no one wanted to play. Just point us toward the bar.

Brad said...

Grundy...why do I get the feeling that if you lived next door, we'd be drinking buddies?

Jormengrund said...

Dana: Yeah, she's kinda "out there"

CS: Like I said, I got your B McB, and I'm going to send her back!

Jaime: Seems to be the modus operandi for just about every christmas dinner an employer puts on, doesn't it?

UR: Yeah. I really wish they'd allow an open bar this year... *dreamy eyes*

Brad: Because I'd be needing a fellow to help me drink away the nasty memories I'd be taking away from here!

Hubman said...

You know, it's kinda ironic reading the last part of this post after the recent bout of severe weather you've had in your neck of the woods.

Also makes me wonder what happened with that "disaster relief fund"?

Jormengrund said...


They don't count severe weather as grounds for a "Disaster".

Tornadoes, SEVERE flooding, and catastophic loss (house, multiple family mambers) are the only qualifying marks for this fund.

Needless to say that "severe" flooding will probably be open for their interpretation..

We had to close the warehouse this last Monday because of the weather, and this still didn't qualify any of the workers for compensation.

There are quite a few folks who work here that live paycheck to paycheck, and each penny is budgeted in order to keep them fed and housed. You close for a day, and they don't get paid, that's one day or two without food or some necessity..

Obviously our HR manager could care, since she's the one who's making the determination as to who qualifies for the relief fund...

Oh look.. I should make this another post, but it's too close to Christmas, and I want it to end on a bit of a lighter note than this.....