Blah, blah, blah...

Well, it's that time of year again.

Corporate visitors who are determined to make your work week (and workday) hell on earth.

They come in, act like they're doing you a favor just by being there, and then tear apart each and every job that you do.

"You know, you could spend a little less time doing that job, and spend a bit more time doing this one."

"Why didn't you take more time doing (job I just said you could take less time on)?"

"By the way, I love how you've got control over this area, but here are some pointers to really help you get the most out of your time at this task."

Ad nauseum.

I'm at the tail-end of an entire network upgrade.

Beacuse of this, I've got computers, memory, and laptop stuff ALL over my office. I can't get rid of the towers or laptops until I've taken the memory and hard drives and disk drives out of these old pieces of crap. Once I do that, then I get to pile said parts into a HUGE box that I'm unable to lift by myself, and try to find some place to store it for a short while.

Then I can put the rest of the stuff on a pallet, and shove it in some dark corner of our warehouse until the disposal truck comes.

While trying to do all of this, said corporate inspector drops by, and offers these words of wisdom:

"You know, if you only did one or two machines at a time, your office wouldn't be as cluttered or crowded."

This is the same fella that two days ago sent me the email stating that all the PCs and laptops needed to be done by the time he got there, or my job would be at stake.

I don't know about you, but when given an ultimatum like that, I tend to take serious action.

Now, we've had the PCs and such for a LOOOONG time. Purchasing bought these back in January, and they got here in March. However, I couldn't DO anything with these machines, beacuse the computer lab folks on the corporate end hadn't gotten their machines yet, and as such, didn't have protocols set up for the new PCs to be installed on our network.

Yeah, that little gem there forced me to sit in my office with 40 boxes of computers that just gathered dust.

Once everything was done, it was time to take ONE machine, and work out the bugs. First, it was the operating system not liking some of the programs we run. So we start going over TONS and TONS of code in order to fix that problem.

Then it was access to specific much-used internet sites that were being denied. So we went back into the firewall hardware to reconfigure security settings.

Finally, I was able to install all the programs and configure the PCs the way that they needed to be. However, each PC took a little over 4 hours to get ready.

Do the math:

4 hours per PC

40 PCs

8 hour workdays.

Yeah. LONG time getting it ready.

Then comes the easy part.. Replacing the old one with the new PC.

Simple, right?

WRONG.

Then you get the calls about this screen saver not being on the new machine. Or this one program that they downloaded (against company protocol!) that they want back on the new machine... Yeah. I lost hair at this point.

So I'm frantically trying to get PCs done, changed out, and then stored in my "locked" office facility.

My office isn't really that big.

In fact, it's really quite tiny.

Once you add the networking hardware and servers, and battery backup and alarm monitoring equipment, it gets even smaller.

Now add 40 boxes of monitors, PC towers, laptops, and memory upgrades.

I have enough room to walk, very carefully, from my desk to my door. That's about it.

So, I finally get the stuff done, I get the drives and memory pulled, I get the towers stashed far and away from my office, I get the new PCs installed.

What next?

"You missed two PCs that need to be installed here this year."

Yeah. The two he's referring to aren't even here yet. One he's directly responsible for, since it's the security PC that hasn't been upgraded for 10 years.

The second is the "new" trial PC they're using for applications. This one is basically going to be a "dumb" terminal, where you turn it on, and it automatically boots to our application site on our LAN, and nothing else.

So yeah, I'd have replaced those if they'd gotten here, but since they're not here, nothing's been done about it.

So here I am, looking fondly at the reclaimed space I now have thanks to my hard work, and wonder just when this guy will leave so that I can get back to doing my job without having the moronic statements put me over the edge.

Wish me luck!

I'm gonna need it, I think.