Sunday, July 11, 2010

The Joke's on Me!

As I stated in my last post, my High School reunion was this weekend. I wanted to go for two main reasons:

First, I didn't go to my last one, and wanted to see what everyone looked like since some time had passed.

Second, there are a couple of folks that I graduated with that I'd really like to see again, and I was hoping that they'd be there.

Well, I was disappointed on both accounts.

The cliques were still the same. Popular kids hung out with each other. Jocks (even the ones who were too out of shape and overweight to ever play again!) hung out with each other. The skinny bitches and built dickheads all stuck like glue.. It was like jumping back into high school for adults, and living the nightmare all over again.

I'd never really fit into any one social pecking order in high school. I played for band, orchestra and choir. I played 4 different sports. I was a bookworm who was able to get pretty good grades without really having to crack the books. The only two things I had going against me were that my family wasn't floating in cash, and I wasn't one of the overly pretty folks.

Thus, I was an outcast from pretty much each and every group in school. Too athletic for the intelligent and musically gifted folks. Too bookish for the jocks. Too ugly for the pretty folks. Too poor to be in with the self-endorsed rich kids who by definition were the most popular because of what they could afford, and had AWESOME party houses when the folks were away.

This weekend showed me that years can pass, but some things will never change. Even with me going out and starting conversations got me a cold shoulder, and not even a grunt for a "hello". I felt relegated to even less than the hired caterers at the party, because at least they were talked to!

All in all, I spent a frustrated evening watching folks get re-acquainted with each other, and I ate yet another slice of humble pie knowing that even though I've got friends and family, there's really not much about me that begs for folks to be interested in me.

Sure, I'm eloquent. I'm snooty and have a bit of a quick wit and temper. I'm stubborn. I argue. I chew at things until it pisses most folks off, and they tell me off about it.

I'm all these things, and yet I'm something more....

I'm a dad. I'm a father who doesn't want to see this kind of thing happen to his kids. I want them to be in the popular groups. I want them to look forward to seeing their classmates after they've graduated. I want them to have the chances I've never had.

My goal now is to try to make that dream a reality.

Here's to dreams.....


Dana said...

Really? I'd much rather Cam be who he is - and be happy with who he is - than be part of any "popular" group.

I've not been to a high school reunion yet (coming up on a 30-year here soon) and not sure I even want to, primarily for the reasons you mentioned. I am beyond grateful that I never got stuck in that frame of mind and instead moved forward.

Bette said...

Your reunion sounds much like my 10 yr. one. I skipped the 20 yr. thing for several reasons. There's one planned for Oct. (32 yrs.) and already wondering if it will be the same all over again.

gottaluvme3 said...

I hate high school reunions. You think people are going to grow up, but most of them don't. I was in the me, myself and I group in high school, and my 2 friends were a year younger then me. Sorry it wasn't any fun....