In Loving Memory

The house isn't pretty. It's functional, neat, clean, and tidy. The window casements are tight, the doors swing well, and fasten securely. The exterior is neatly painted, and the white is accented nicely with light blue trim. Light curtains adorn the interior windows.

Flowers of every shape, size and color are arrayed in neat beds fringing the small home. A comfortable porch has a small rocking chair off to one side of the front door. The welcome mat sits in front, greeting each visitor.

The lawn is lush, well groomed and trim. The grass is fragrant, and well tended. Small cuts are made in the sod in various places to give root to rose bushes, small trees, and a couple of well-trimmed hedges.

Rocking easily in the chair on the porch, a man sits softly whittling away at a small piece of wood. What is to become of it, only the maker can guess at. Maybe a pin for a small toy, or an arm for a doll..

The large and gentle hands are calloused, but there is a deftness and care in each movement borne of years of exercise and labor. The eyes are bright, and the only wrinkles to mar the smooth face are those caused from laughter. The hair is dark, reminiscent of a cast-iron skillet. The mouth is generous, and quick with a smile. The deep chest and broad shoulders speak of a body used to hard work. The knees are no longer bothered with injury, and help move the rocker with ease and vigor.

The man looks up, and peers into the distance. Sheer joy crosses his face, as he sees someone he's been waiting for come into view.

The woman is short, and slightly overweight. A caring smile and bright blue eyes are very easy to distinguish. Her chestnut hair is long, but worn into a tightly-woven bun on the back of her head, and kept neatly in place with a hair net and bobby pins. A colorful sun dress decorated with flowers is draped over her, and sensible stockings and sturdy brown leather shoes adorn her feet. Her step quickens when she looks and sees the man sitting in the chair.

He stands, his lanky and tall frame smoothly rising from the chair with the ease from years of practice as the whittled piece of wood is forgotten and drops off his lap onto the porch floor. He focuses on her face, and descends the steps towards her.

Closing the distance, he is finally able to bring her into reach, and he grasps her hands, and looks into her eyes.

"I've been waiting for you, and it's so good to have you home mother." he tells her.

Hugging her to his chest, the love and warmth can be felt for miles, as the lonesome house now returns to a loving home.

She's gone home, and she's at peace.

I love you grandma, and even though I'll miss you, at least I know that you're home, and you're happy.

Rest in eternal love and peace.

My first Award!!

Veronica, at Another Suburban Housewife, gave me an award while I was out on vacation.

I'm actually quite stunned, because I feel that there are so many blogs out there that are so much more worthy than mine, all I do is write down the silly and interesting things I have happen to me, and for some reason, folks seem to like it.

There are apparently rules with this award, and they are as follows:

1. Have to post the fabulous Logo (as seen above)

2. Nominate some folks for their blogs.

3. Have to hyper link your nominees.

4. You must tell your nominee that they WON! Hello? How would they know if you didn't comment on their blog.

5. Finally Hyperlink the blogger who gave you such a wonderful gift.

Pretty easy, except that I'm going to have to figure out how to add the stinking logo.. Arrgh!

Ok, nominees...

I nominate Real Live Lesbian, mainly for the fact that she's always an interesting read.

I also am going to nominate my wife, Gottaluvme3, as she's my inspiration for nearly everything that I write.

ASM stole Dana from Amid Life's Crisis, so I'm going to go with Bee, from Bee's Musings

And lastly, I'm going to nominate Brad, from Diaries of the Professor.

Hope that satisfies everyone...

Now.. on to the fun..

Day three of vacation..

TO be honest, we were BEAT. Two days of non-stop walking, fighting with crowds, and just being in a hurry to get things done. It was time for a break.

The nice thing about having a long time to enjoy a vacation is the fact that you can pick and choose your timetable. For our day of rest, it decided to rain in the normally sunny Southern California, so we took the day off to recoup, and just take some time for family.

We played games, slept in, went down and played pool and ping-pong in the recreation room at our hotel, and basically took it easy.

The adults sat around for a while and discussed options for the rest of the week, and we planned out what days we'd be having lunches or dinners at the hotel, and what days were going to be spent dishing out cash for lavish treatment.

The decision was made to travel to Universal Studios the following day, and spend the entire day there. Then the following two days could be utilized to play around again at Disneyland and California Adventure. Everyone agreed with this decision, and ideas were tossed around. One was to spend the first day back to Disneyland early, and have a "Character Breakfast" with some of the Disney Characters making visits to your table while you ate. This was a great idea, and the younger two of my kids adored this idea.

So we went grocery shopping to get food for the times we'd spend in the room, some extra snacks and such for the parks, and then we watched a bit of TV, had some dinner, and played a few more games before calling it a night, and crashing in order to get ready for the next day of fun.. Except for the nasty LA traffic, that is!

Universal Studios Tour is tomorrow.. Don't miss it!!

Vacation day #2

Well, we decided to start early again on day two. It was a Sunday, and to start things off, it really wasn't that bad. A bit overcast, but a nice day overall.

We returned to Disneyland, and ran to a few of the attractions that we hadn't gotten to in our last visit. This also allowed us to kill some time as California Adventure (the Disney park right across from Disneyland) didn't open until 10:00..

So we ran around a bit more, dealing with minor crowds, but nothing even approaching the massive spawn of humanity that we had to deal with the previous day.

We went in and did the Jungle cruise, Pirates of the Caribbean, the Haunted Mansion, and then we took on Splash Mountain. I have to admit, I got SOAKED. There were six of us in the boat, as my youngest son didn't want to go on the ride. So my dad stayed down with him, and they did some more tame rides while the rest of us went on the water ride. My son and niece sat up in front, then my daughter and mom in the middle, and my wife and I took the back seats.

Big. Mistake.

Putting the adults in the back three seats only begged for the boat to swap with water each and every time we turned a corner. Not to mention how much water slopped over the sides when we went down any kind of incline.

At the end of the ride, I waddled out to try to find some dry spot on my clothing, and decided it was best to find a place to camp out for a while, and drip-dry.

So, we had lunch, and then proceeded to cross over to California Adventure!

This park reminds me more of a carnival-type of place, and not really much of a theme park.

Sure, there are themed areas, but for the most part, it's an attempt to combine the fun of Disneyland and the thrill of a carnival ride. I liked the "Soaring over California" ride, the "Tower of Terror" Twilight Zone elevator drop, California Screamin' rollercoaster, and the Mali-Boomer jet ride. These rides more than made up for the line waits, and the pablem of kiddie rides dispersed all through the park.

However, my downfall again on this visit was to be water.

The favorite ride of our family group turned out to be one of my serious nemesis-type rides of the vacation. Namely, the Grizzly River Rapids Run.

Yes, another water ride.

The first time, we found that each "inner tube" raft was capable of fitting all 8 of us in one cart. So we piled in, and I noticed that my wife and my dad were sitting close to me. This became noteworthy in that I got drenched during the ride. This is when I also made the discovery about the drains in the rafts, and that these said drains not only drain water from the ride, but they allow water to shoot into the ride as well!

Yeah. I was soaked.

But it was so much fun that we went again.

Two more times, in fact.

I think I got more water from those three rides than all of the rainstorms I've ever been in combined. And that's saying something coming from a lifetime resident of the Pacific Northwest!

Anyway, at the end of the day I was able to drop dry sufficiently for us to leave, grab a shuttle bus to our hotel, and call it a grand adventure. We topped it off with a view of the Disney Park, and watched the fireworks presentation from our balcony.

We slept good that night, if only because of the sheer exhaustion from being in the parks from open until nearly close two nights in a row.

More about day 3 tomorrow!




Now, a different note:

Veronica (am I the only one who pictures the Archies comic of the spoiled little rich girl??) better known as ASM (Another Suburban Mom) awarded me my very first prize for my blog!

I don't know all of the details, but I'm going to read up on it more, and see about posting it later today or tomorrow!

I'm baaaaaack!

Yes, I survived.

The crowds were insane.

The lines were long.

The heat wasn't TOO bad, and it even rained one day while we were out gallavanting...

But all in all, it was a great time.

We flew out on Friday, the 13th, and arrived into John Wayne airport (or Orange County Air, or Santa Anna International.. Take your pick of what name to use!). Getting the rental was interesting..

There were 8 of us, so a conventional minivan or SUV wouldn't cut it. No, we opted for the 15 passenger econo-van. Yes, this monster wouldn't even fit in the airport parking garage, so me and my family got to stand out in the rain at the loading area while my dad hiked with a rental agent to get the van. I even was able to get in trouble there, since my dad didn't park close enough to the loading zone, and a police officer mistook him for a shuttle driver, and proceeded to chew us out for not obeying his traffic laws. I could have easily gotten ticketed that day, if my wife hadn't calmed me down enough to let me know that spending your first day on vacation isn't so fun when you're in jail. Thanks hon!

We got to the hotel, unpacked, and collapsed into separate piles of mush. I never really noticed before, but packing, travelling and unpacking really takes a toll on the mental and physical fortitude of a person. We anxiously watched the news for weather reports, and plotted our plan of attack for the upcoming days.

For the sake of keeping this blog manageable, I'm going to talk about our first day there.

Yup. Valentine's Day.

We went in when the park opened, and proceeded to swim with the other Homo Sapiens in a massive jumble of humanity. Lines were insanely long, crowds were rude, and as long as you weren't in anybody's way, you didn't run the risk of getting run over while walking through the park. Fast passes are a great idea, but the waiting in line to get one is just incredible. I mean, who ever thought up "fast passes" is a god, but how about a fast pass in order to get a fast pass? Waiting in line an hour to get a slip of paper that's good for a quick line for a great ride, but you have to wait an hour to use is kind of an oxymoron, in my humble opinion.

I mean, with the two hours I've wasted waiting in line to get the slip, and then to wait in order to get on the ride, I'm sure I'd have been able to get in line twice for the same stinking ride.........

Anyway, the day was interesting, my dad and I were able to sneak an order of flowers up to the rooms without my mom or my wife noticing, and the day went fairly smoothly.

Dinner was interesting, but at least food was procured for everyone, and we were then able to head home with little energy left for much else.

However, the hotel we stayed at had an excellent view of the Disney parks, and we were able to watch the firework shows from our balconies instead of rubbing elbows with everyone in the park.

Day two's events will be tomorrow, stay tuned!

Something I raelly don't understand..

Well, I said I wasn't going to write about my family.

I lied.

My wife is a very single-minded individual when it comes to things she wants. This can be a good or bad thing, but for me, I see it as a blessing and one of her best character traits.

This last year, she finally found her half-brothers, and made contact with them, and was able to meet them and their wives.

Myself, I didn't see much in it, because I'd grown up with my family all around me, and not had the supposed stigma of a divided family where my brother is only like 9 days older than myself..

Thus, we get to an issue that happened this week that has really bothered me.

Since reconnecting with her brothers, my wife has been trying to do everything possible to befriend and get to know these folks that she shares common blood with.

I applaud this, and I encouraged her.

However, the more she tried to get to know them, the more we were pushed away.

Now? I'm pissed.

My wife went out this last weekend with the girls. This led to some curious behavior, and high-school drama best left to children, and not adults.

First off, the new additions to the family are drinkers. I don't really have a problem with folks drinking, in fact I have a glass or two myself every now and then. However, it does decrease your mental capacity, and you might say or do things which on a "normal" day you wouldn't think of doing otherwise.

Well, on one such occasion, the two were drinking, and were quite inebriated. This led to a confession from the wife of one of the brothers to my wife about her and some indiscretions she'd taken while being married.

My wife kept it quiet. After all, she wanted to be there FOR her family, not tear it apart.

A few weeks later, at another get-together, the bride of the other brother while intoxicated also admitted that there had been indiscretions committed by the other wife while she was married. I was actually in the room at this time, and heard this confession.

Now, just this last week, the ladies went out again, and got their drink on. Enter in my wife's friend, who is quite the flirt, and also very willing to get her drink on as well. They went to the first bar (yes, I did say FIRST here), and proceeded to have a few, and talk. The two wives decided to go to another place, and my wife and her friend dropped by her brother's house to say hello before continuing on. During this, the wife called, and found out about the visit. Jealousy reigned supreme, and all hell broke loose.

Apparently, when you've cheated on your spouse, you're unable to think that the other one is willing and able to think about nothing but their love and affection for their loved one, and so the assumption is that because they did it, the other one will as well.

My wife and friend get to the next bar, and conversation starts, but there's a lying undertone of malice. One wife leaves the bar for a while, assumed to go out for a smoke, yet leaving her smokes and keys and purse on the table.

I don't know about you, but I find it awfully difficult to smoke when I don't have a cigarette, don't you?

Add to this that these two wives were also shamelessly flirting with men at other tables.

I wasn't there, but from some things I've observed, I highly doubt that my wife and her friend were lying about these actions.

Now we get to the problem I've got.

This family of my bride's is really starting to annoy me.

Now? She doesn't care what they do. They've chewed her out, called her a bitch, and proceeded to erase her from their lives.

Why?

Because they are running away from their problems, and deciding that if they cover it up enough, then they won't have to deal with their ugly and dirty laundry that they've scattered all over this small town.

Now, I'm normally laid back, and reserved. I don't like to get into a confrontation.

However, if I were to see either of these two families anytime soon, I'd be more than willing to give them a piece of my mind.

They've used our goodwill, and our hospitality, and then tossed us to the curb when it got to be something "normal". Now, they aren't willing to talk, and since we know that they're not the stellar people that they've professed to be, they're trying to run away and hide.

For me, I could care.

But I hurt for the loss done to my wife.

It's family she knew that she had, but hasn't really had time to connect with.

Knowing the character of these folks now, I can honestly say "good riddance", but there is a part of me that wishes things could have been different somehow.

Anyway, I'm off after today, and I'm going to be away on vacation.

I'll write more when I get back, and tell you all about our trip, and the fun things we did.. Maybe even some of the drama that I'm suspecting is going to rear it's ugly head, too!

Have a great week, and I'll see you all on the 24th!

(im)Patiently Waiting

Have you had those days when you're coming up to a nice vacation period, and you just can't stand the stuff going on around you?

Yeah.

I'm there.

I have today and tomorrow to work, and then I'm off for a nice vacation with the family.

However, it seems like every idiot and moron in my workplace has come out of the woodwork and decided to put on one special show for me before I go.

Let's talk shop, shall we?

Yesterday I had to be called in to set things up because one of my maintenance managers just can't get it into his head that he doesn't know SQUAT about computers.

They have been stripping and then re-waxing and repainting offices this year, since it's been 5 years since it was done last.

Because of this, offices are being cleared out, and then they paint and wax, and then shovel it all back into the office.

However, this specific office houses the network printers that we use to not only print out the labels needed for proper inventory, but it also housed the data and fax lines for traffic communication with the shipping company that we use.

All of this was unplugged, dragged out into the warehouse, and left to sit over the weekend.

Come Monday morning, they put everything back into the office, and plug it in, but NOTHING worked.

This is because not only did they not plug it back in where they'd taken it from, but they completely moved around the office furniture.

The printers I've got have a dedicated line and server for them to operate correctly, and just plugging them into any data port is like hooking up a phone to a dead jack. It won't get you anywhere. Also, there are more data ports physically in my warehouse than I have positions available on my data switches, so there are specific data ports that aren't live unless I physically go in and punch them down onto the network switch.

Because of this, I know what items work, and what jacks to plug things into.

"Normal" folks don't.

Thus I got to waste 2 hours of time plugging stuff back into switches, reprogramming a printer, and clearing out error messages from documents that were sent to printers that weren't online.

Annoying? Most definitely.

Boring? Not really.

Tedious. Absolutely.

I am honestly counting the minutes until I'm able to get out of here, and get on that plane. I don't care what the day or date is, I don't care if we have to sit on the tarmac because of weather. I just want out of this circus, and not have to worry about stupid stuff for at least a week. The most challenging thing I want to cope with is what ride to take the kids to next, or decide where we're going to eat lunch.

I think I need some Advil, so I'm headed to lunch...

More ranting tomorrow.

Countdown!

It's less than a week now before I take off with the family for Disneyland.

I'm kind of excited.

One, my kids have never been, and it's going to be great to see their faces and excitement when we get there.

Two, I haven't been down there in ages (since I graduated High School nearly 20 years ago) and there's been plenty of changes done since then.

Lastly, there's family of mine that live down here that my wife and kids have never met. I really want to get a chance to see them and introduce them all.

I can remember when going down to California and Disneyland was a "ho-hum" type of trip. I mean, we went EVERY year to visit my dad's family (he's from Southern California), and while there, we'd raid Disneyland, Knott's Berry Farm, Magic Mountain, Universal Studios, and sometimes even go further south and attack Sea World and the San Diego zoo..

My favorite memories were of going to Escondido, and playing around in that family fun center (that's now closed) where the kids would all get like $30, and be let loose to run, play, jump, hide, and just be kids for an entire day. Parents could sit around and gossip and talk, and kids found ways to entertain themselves.

I really want to be able to take my kids to see some historic sites as well sometime.

I loved going on road trips every once in a while, and seeing things like the city UNDER Sacramento, or Alcatraz, Old San Francisco, teach the kids about the Gold Rush, visit ghost towns, that kind of thing...

I have plans also at some point to take the wife along with me to go up to Victoria BC, and just have some alone time.

See the Buchardt Gardens, maybe have high tea at the Empress Hotel, tandem bike through the town, and just see the sights.

There are so many places I've been to and seen that I want to be able to share with my family.. I just don't know how to fit them all in, and still be able to afford it!

Name off some of your most favorite places to visit, and recommendations of things that are a MUST see.

Now for something completely different...

With all of the drama that has been going on, I'm going to step completely away from it all, and recall something from my past.

Because of my mood, it's going to be something fun, and also has to do with shooting.


Back in my High School days, a friend of mine got me hooked on Paintball.

Once a month, we'd save up enough cash to buy some gas, paintballs, CO2 and some spending money to go out for a weekend and play around.

There were 8 of us in this group. I'll give you nicknames, since a couple of them could potentially read this, and assume that I'm talking smack about them and their "game".

There was B-dawg. He was the Alpha of the group. He had the suburban, the guns, and the drive. We were all really along for the ride, and he was willing to drag us along with him. Not a great shot, but he more than made up for it in enthusiasm.

There was NJ. This dude SCARED me. He was sneaky, he was crafty, he was thin, and he was quiet. If you had him on your team, you won. If not, you lost. Nothing else needed to be said.

There was "Pops". This is my brother, and he was enthusiastic, but he made a better target than a shooter. We'd usually send him out to get folks to chase him so we could sneak up on the ones hunting him and his loud sounds. Sad, but quite effective.

There was Egg. My best friend in school, he didn't even know the business end of the pistol from the stock, but once he learned, he got quite good. The consummate nerd, he insisted on keeping his gear so that he could "tweak" things, and he was always tinkering with things to get the most performance out of it. He's since moved on to become quite proficient at World of Warcraft, so you can see how well he's doing for himself.

There was Bubba. Bubba was something of an anolmaly. He was HUGE. I mean it. As a sophomore in school, he stood an intimidating 6'8" tall. However, he was sneaky and quiet. There wasn't much of a chance of sneaking up on him, and somehow he'd get the drop on you if you thought he wasn't looking. He usually found a way to be on NJ's team, but on the off chance he wasn't your team wouldn't lose as badly as it could have.

There was Loafie. So named for his bathroom prowess. This guy was usually placed in an out-of-the-way place so that when his gastular explosions took place, there wouldn't be as many affected home team players. Other teams would be in for a shock, but we'd know where he was, and would steer clear of the area. We also liked to call him "Biohazard".

Deuce. Yup. Deuce. He was the second of a set of twins. His brother didn't like to play, so he'd come along just to see about shooting a few folks, and get his aggression out. Not the best player, but good enough to give a couple of folks some serious pause.

And then yours truly. I was decent, but I preferred to snipe at folks instead of going out and trying to make them find me. I'd usually get killed off by NJ, but only after he'd taken down the rest of my team. On most days, he and I would be the last two standing, unless Bubba had a good day, and then it would be 2-1 against me.

Anyway, we'd usually split into teams by drawing numbers. Then we'd pass out the ammo and reloads, let one team take off for 10-15 minutes, and then head out. We'd play wherever we could find woods. Being in the Pacific Northwest, that meant someone's backyard. Usually Bubba's or NJ's.

The time I'm going to relate is when we actually went out of state, and found an out-of-the-way spot. It was just outside of an Air Force training area, and we were given the "green light" to play to our heart's content up there.

We climbed into B-Dawg's suburban, and took off for a weekend of fun and mayhem.

Little did we know how much competition would be out there.

For those of you who DON'T know about paintball, there are folks who are experts, and those that play for fun.

We played for fun.

Because of this, a couple of us had pneumatic guns, but the majority had these little pistols that would compress air when you "cocked" the gun, and were loaded with tubes of paintballs.

Now, the "real" folks who played had the CO2 cartridge guns, with hoppers FILLED with paintballs. No hand-fed loading, no mess, just serious firepower.

Well, we got to our destination, and were having a serious blast. Folks were shooting and getting shot, bases were captured, and fun was had all around.

Then something happened.

Another group showed up.

With 8 guys.

Apparently this was the place they came to regularly to practice. They were two squads of 4 men teams who would play in local tournaments and such for cash.

Yeah. They were serious players.

And we stupidly challenged them to a round.

I have never been bruised as badly as I was that day.

Arms, legs, chest (even with the padding) my head and ears were even bruised.

Sure, a face shield pretects you from getting stuff in your eyes and mouth, but it doesn't do much for your ears or back of the head or neck!

Fingers and hands were a favorite target as well.

Well, after two rounds of getting just beaten down by these guys, our group came together, and made a decision.

We were going to play NASTY.

These guys were actually getting pleasure out of inflicting pain on us, so it was time to return the favor.

Bubba and NJ made up one small squad.

I was teamed up with B-Dawg.

Pops and Loafie made up another group, and Egg and Deuce made up the last squad.

The idea was to lure these guys into chasing one of the group, and have the other just destroy them. By destroy, we're talking pumping them FULL of paintballs.

Usually, on a kill, you use one shot, and if it hits, they're down.

We were going to show no quarter, and keep firing until we were happy with the painting result.

Each team had one person with a airgun, and one with the "play" handgun.

Handgun folks were the bait.

I had a handgun.

I wasn't happy about the deal, but I went along with it because I wanted revenge, even if it was played through someone else's trigger.

So we started.

I slithered through the wood and brush, listening for any kind of action.

Suddenly, I heard breaking branches, and I stopped. There, just 15 feet away from me were two guys from the "other" side.

They hadn't seen me, because they were actually tailing one of my other groups.

I waved to B-dawg, and we moved quietly to flank them.

I didn't know what kind of impact I'd be able to make with my "toy" gun, but I was determined to at least make one of them feel this big when I got through with them.

B-dawg got in a good spot, and nodded for me to move.

Getting ready, I aimed, and shot the nearest fella right in the groin. Yeah. The nuts. The family jewels. You come up with an analogy, that's where I hit him.

I've never heard a squeal quite like his before, and I'm not sure I'll ever forget it. Falling over, his partner kept his eyes on him, wondering what had happened.

That's when B-dawg took his shot.

Yeah. The butt. Poop chute. Hershey highway. Et all.

It was mean, it was underhanded, and totally unfair.

But we were enjoying the revenge rush.

We found Egg and Deuce, who were the pair being chased, and got our bearings. NJ and Bubba were nowhere to be seen, but we could hear some serious shots going on just past us. We decided to stay in small groups, and see about flanking the action.

We came onto a scene that would've made me laugh if I'd been of a mindset to chuckle.

Pops and Loafie were pinned next to a fallen gargantuan tree, and were trying to find a way to get a shot off. However, the two guys on them had them flanked, and weren't going for the kill shot, they were trying to see who could wind up with the head-shot on them. I know, I heard them talking about it from 10 feet away.

I was livid.

That was my brother.

That was my friend out there, and they were getting picked on.

I took aim, and put a paintball in the nearest one's ear. Deuce started in on the guy on the opposite side. We then stood and pounded paint on these two until we were tired of holding our guns up.

Neon green, Orange, Yellow, Blue and Pink covered the ground, and I'm sure there were two very hurt guys under it all, but from the way they'd treated us, I didn't care. I wanted the rest of the group.

Suddenly, like a ghost, NJ and Bubba were next to us, and telling us where the other two groups were.

Pops, Loafie and Deuce went with NJ, and B-Dawg Egg and I followed Bubba.

We found our group keeping an eye out for a small path that our group had been using. We waited, and soon enough heard the screams from close by as the other group got the drop on the amushers that were left.

The two in front of us decided to move.. Right into our path.

We waited until someone spotted Bubba's shoe.

Then we opened fire.



That day wasn't the most proud day I've had, but it taught me a lesson that I've taken with me.

Never underestimate an untrained person. They might just surprise you.

See you all tomorrow!

DA RULEZ

Due to some unforseen circumstances, I'm going to post these rules about my blog. I would expect that these were implied, but apparently if you don't write them down, then folks don't care, and just do as they please. So I'm going to state it this one time, I'll refer back to them as necessary, and hopefully we'll be able to get along better on this blog.

Rule #1:

EVERYTHING that I write about on this blog is from MY perspective. I don't claim that it's going to be completely accurate, nor that it's going to be the full un-objective truth. It's going to be how I see it, my feelings, my perspective.

Rule #2:

Comments made should be directed towards me. I might talk about my wife or kids, however, this is in relation to ME, and thus the comments need to be about me, not my subjects.

Rule #3:

Please be polite and courteous when commenting. I don't come over to your page and start pissing matches with other people, please don't do it on mine.

Rule #4:

My blog, my rules. If you don't follow them, any and ALL comments you make WILL be deleted. That's just they way I do business.

These are pretty simple and straight-forward rules. If you want to make some kind of scathing comment, feel free to say so on your own blog, and link it back on the comments. I have no problems with this.

However, due to the drama and ire that has been revolving around my page, I felt the need to state these obvious rules, and hope that they will help to restore the peace.

I'll write my "real" post a bit later.

Thank you.

resolution!

After reading the comments, deleting things that didn't need to be said, and talking with a couple of other folks, I've come to a determination here.

This blog is going to be about ME.

If I talk about my wife, it's only going to be in reference to ME.

If I say something, it's from MY perspective.

There's not going to be anything regarding objectivity here.

I will write how I see things, and from my viewpoint.

However, with this in mind, I'm going to be limiting what I say and talk about regarding my wife and family.

This may mean that I'll be blogging about the weather, or some ant crawling across the floor of my office because nearly 9-10ths of my blog have been centered around me and my relationship.

No More.

After reading Bee's comment, I realized that she was right.

I'm hurting my spouse by saying these things, even if I believe in what I'm writing.

Because of this, I need to start editing my writing, and thinking through what it is I'm trying to say.

Yes, even an asshole can learn to be Politically Correct, and I'm going to take that crash-course starter class.

So, as of today, my posts regarding myself and my family are going to be coming off the board.

I don't know if I'm going to delete them, or just restrict access, but they'll be taken off.

I need to learn to think first and foremost about my family, even to the detriment of myself, or things that I enjoy.

Thank you all for your comments, and I hope you keep reading.

Confessional

Well, I can tell when I post something that's a bit too brutally honest, because my wife will get on here and yell at me about it.

I don't feel the need to apologize on here, because after all, this is a kind of journal about who I am, and what I'm feeling. So if I offended, don't read.

That being said, I have been wondering since our "discussion" last night about some things...

Before I got some help in my lying problem, I never could have imagined that being completely honest could be considered a bad thing.

Now?

I'm not so sure, really.

I mean, look at the last post. I opened my heart, and blogged about how I felt. This, in turn, caused the woman I love to become very upset with me over how I expressed my feelings. In a sense, I was too honest, and it really pissed her off.

So now I'm trying to figure out (in my lying rehab-kind of way) where would the compromise be? When is it "ok" to lie? When is telling the "full" truth too much?

I'm still pretty new to the whole full-disclosure stuff. I mean, for me telling a lie is like offering a drink to an alcoholic. You can make the choice to tell that lie, or take that drink, but the chances of falling back on your old behaviors increase exponentially.

My wife doesn't believe that. Not one bit.

In her opinion, I'm just making a choice, and that I choose to lie, or tell the truth. There's no habit to break, there's nothing that could cause me to just up and run with it once the first one has been said.

Me?

I grew up telling lies to get out of trouble. I was pretty darn good at it, too. I'd lie just to keep from getting a wooden paddle, or power cord whipping, or my face slapped. I never knew what kind of punishment I'd get, so I'd make sure that the story I told had enough truth in it to be believeable, and then the rest would just be a type of garnish.

It became a habit. I'd lie to the folks outside of the house, because I didn't want them to know about my family, or how I was being treated. I wanted them to think I was a normal, well-adjusted kid. Not an abused soul who was desperately trying to find a way out and survive.

I'd lie to my parents, just to make living there bearable. Chores, minor jobs, homework, you name it. They asked, I did, and then I'd lie of something went wrong. I knew what they expected of me, so the lies were easier to make up for people you knew.

I'd lie at school. I didn't want the teachers or cousellors to know what was going on at home, because I feared the scrutiny. What would my parents do to me if they suddenly were investigated because of my behavior at school?

Pretty soon, the lies were more of my reality than the truth was.

And there's the rub.

Now? I've been very good about keeping myself honest. Yeah, I embellish a little, but my wife reminds me, and I reign myself in, and tone it down. I've been brutally honest, and things seem to be going well, until the honesty gets to be too much, and feelings get hurt.

You know, it's very true that the saying "Truth hurts" is more than just an emotional hurt. Feelings _do_ get hurt. But there are times when the truth feels more like a punch in the gut or kidneys than anything else.

I'm still learning, and I'm trying to come to terms with who I am.

However, don't think for a second that I'll apologize for telling my side of a story.

Yeah, you might not like what I have to say, but it's my opinion, and my feelings. I have the right to say these things, and I'll be more than willing to talk about them even if you're not reading. That's YOUR decision, and your choice.

I'll talk about some funny stories tomorrow, unless the wife and I get into a fight about this post tonight.. Then there'll be more about that tomorrow!

Stay tuned.

I just don't get it.. I really don't.

Ok. Time for this guy to complain again about the fairer (most of the time) sex.

There are too many things about ladies that I appreciate. Sights, sounds, smells, talks, looks, feelings, etc.

Yet there are a couple of things that REALLY tend to set me off.

One of these really bothered me this weekend, and true to form, I'm gonna blog about it.

I can't stand the wishy-washy double standards.

I'll give you an example:

I've got some guy friends. We LOVE to hang out and kill time. One friend of mine especially likes to sit around and play video games with me. If I didn't know better, I'd say that he's wired just about like I am.

Now, my wife has been teasing me this last weekend about how I haven't been calling my friends to just go and "hang out". Each time I've called, it's been to ask for help with something around the house here.

I can recall her picking on me just a few months ago about how I need to call these guys to come help me with things around the house, instead of calling them to go run off and play.

Now. Is it one, or the other?

Why can't I do both?

I mean, there are times where I need the extra hands with work around the house. So I give a buddy a call, and we get it done.

There are also those times when I'd really like to get away from it all, and have a bit of "playtime". Then I'd give a buddy a call, and we'd say "screw it" to responsibility, and just play around for a short while.

However, my bent lately has been for fixing things up around the house.

Is this a bad thing? I don't think so.

My wife and I have been looking into refinancing our mortgage, because we could potentially save an extra 7-8 HUNDRED dollars a month in payments.

However, in order to re-fi, you need to have an assessor come and check out the house.

I don't know about you all, but there are TONS of half-done jobs around my place.

The reason behind this?

Well, one, I'm a bit ADD when it comes to home repair and remodel stuff, and I can't stay on task for very long before wanting to move to a different project.

Two, we'll get into a job, and run out of parts or pieces, and forget to buy more for a while. Then, it starts to look "normal", and we tend to overlook that half-done appearance.

So, I've been a bit of an ass. I nag about needing this thing, or that, just to focus on getting ONE JOB at a time done.

I've got the checklist, and I've been marking down when I'm able to complete a job.

Patch holes in the walls? Check.

Install new door for the new bedroom addition? Check.

Cut trim for new door? Check.

Cut trim for French door we installed last year? Check.

Replace sliding glass door? Check.

Cut and lay floor molding? Um, in process. Big job, ugly angles, and off-center house make this job a bit more difficult than it should be.

Paint? NO.

My wife told me she'd take care of the painting. I informed her that I wasn't going to finish the floor trim until the painting was done, so that there would be one less hassle to deal with. She agreed, and now I get to wait for her to get HER butt in gear.

Replace all windows on the house? Check. Still trying to find a couple of pesky leaks, though. I might have taken care of this yesterday, but we'll definitely find out the next time it rains!

Put up blinds in all bedroom windows? Check. I even re-strung the blinds that were too long, because I wasn't willing to wait for my wife to do these like she'd claim.

So, my last major project is the floor moldings. However, I'm not able to do one room because of all the junk in the room itself. Each time I make mention of this, something gets ADDED to the clutter, instead of getting CLEARED OUT.

Maybe I should try reverse psychology, and compliment her on the empty room?

I dunno.

I do know that her deadline of getting the entire house trimmed by Wednesday is a pipe dream. She's wanting to impress the visitors we're going to have over when she hosts her Bunco party.

These same folks were here a couple months ago when there wasn't much on the walls but paint, and she didn't bat an eye. Now? The only thing missing is floor trim, and I get demands about needing it all done right away!

I don't get it.

Our house is quite old, and it's also three stories tall. The main problem with this is the major weight-bearing wall that runs the length of our house. It rises the full three stories, and is a main wall for our bedroom, my daughter's bedroom, and a computer room/office area we've got. But I've noticed in all the remodel and repair work that I've done on the house that it's this wall that is causing our house to settle weirdly.

It's a BIG wall. Because of it's size, it's settled, but the location of the wall is near the center of the house, and it has caused the house to settle inward towards the wall.

I can tell, because of the lines around the house when measuring.

This wall is off about a quarter of an inch. That one isn't quite square. The door jamb isn't quite centered...

These things don't seem very bad, until you're the one trying to fix the small unslightly blemishes to make the house look better.

The wall isn't square? How is that going to be a problem?

Well, the corner you decided to put the bathroom vanity in isn't square, so the sink insert you've got now sits weirdly, and won't stay in place. How do I fix that? Caulk, caulk, and more caulk! If I can hide the gaps, maybe someone won't notice!

Windows are levelled when installed, but now you can see from the outside that they don't match the level of the trimwork around the house.

Um, I can't really _do_ anything about this one. The trimwork is the original trim, and it follows the exterior of the house. As I've said, the house is settling, and for the windows to be installed correctly, they are now out of square with the rest of the house. There's really nothing I can do right now to fix this.

I'm NOT going to pay the extra cash to have someone come out, jack up my foundation, and put cracks into the walls I've just spent the last couple of months fixing.. At least not until I'm ready to sell this place and move somewhere else!

Well, I think I'm done for now.

Like I'd said before, we have our disagreements, and when we do, I tend to air my feelings here. She knows this, and has come to grudgingly accept it.

This is one of those times. I kind of know what I'd like to have done, but I just can't get everyone else into the same boat.

Wanna buy a house? I could make you a great deal....