Friday, April 17, 2009

Things that are bothering me..

Have you ever felt like even though you're married, you're just "playing house"?

I mean, you have a solid relationship, yet the passion and little things just aren't there. You're kind of running off a set script of things that "all married folks are supposed to do" and there's just no spontinaety or passion in the relationship just don't seem to be there. The spark seems to have died?

Yeah. Me too.

But I refuse to give up.

I love this person I'm with. I adore her, actually.

Not only that, but I made her a promise, and I'm going to stick to it.

You all might have heard it a couple of times before. You know the one I'm talking about..

"For better, for worse. For richer, for poorer. In sickness and in health. As long as we both shall live."

Yeah. That promise.

Sure, there are times where it seems like all we're really dealing with is the worse, and we wonder where the heck the better went to. Sometimes richer seems so far off, and we're stuck with the poorer. Some of us are stuck in the sickness part, and wonder if any health is on the way.

Yet I've got to be stubborn.

I made this woman a promise. Not only that, but I also told this to her parents, my parents, her friends, and my friends as well.

What kind of man could I consider myself if things got tough, and I just decided to quit?

What kind of father could I consider myself if I can't set an example for my boys about making commitments, and then not follow through on them?

What kind of example would I be giving my daughter if I were to jump from wife to wife? What kind of self-esteem issues will that make for her in her later years when she potentially decides to marry? Is she going to think that she's as expendable as the women I married?

Maybe I'm just not willing to see the big picture. Maybe in some way I'm being an egotistical bastard, and I'm not giving a damn about someone else's feelings.

However, I still have to be true to myself.

And the truth is that I love this person, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep my promises and vows.

My hope is that each and every one of you feels the same way, and can possibly share this with your significant other or spouse.

The greatest gift each human being posesses is the ability to love. Don't squander it.

I'll talk with you all next week.


Dana said...

As you know, I have been ridiculed numerous times on my blog regarding my decision to stay in a less than happy marriage. I've been told I am being abusive to my son, that I am foolish, materialistic, etc.

I want to be the first one to say that I admire your commitment - to your wife - to your family - to yourself!

HLB said...

At least you love your wife try being married to someone you dont love. Then you find someone you really were in love with. But they dont love you. Try being in that mess

razorsandvines said...

I liked what you wrote here.

Diesel said...

I feel the same way. About your wife, I mean. We've been meaning to tell you.

Brad said...

Diesel stole my joke...again...

(seriously, dude...stop)

Siren said...

Can i suggests sex toys and black latex that should put some spice in things. I admire your commitment, wishing you all the best.

HLB... wow, good luck with all that.

just a girl... said...

This is why I refuse to get married. I personally think that to stick just to stick is crazy.

I commend your commitment to your wife. You can tell that love her, even when you complain.

But me personally. I believe life is too short. I have seen toooooo many people get married then stay just to stay. I couldn't do it.