Revelations

I almost met God today.

I'm not joking.

I have been taking classes since December of last year to flush out my degree in computer science. This week is finals week for the quarter, and I was in my car heading to class to take a final on some classes I'd taken for Windows Server 2008.

While driving, I was quizzing myself over things I'd read, and was keeping an eye out for traffic since Friday traffic is usually ugly and tough to deal with.

While stopped at a stoplight, I changed the radio station, checked my mirrors, and then waited.

The light turned green, I waited for some cross-traffic to clear, and headed into the intersection to get past them and merge onto the freeway for some fun stop-and-go bumper-to-bumper traffice all the way to the school.

As I got into the intersection, I noted a flash of blue out of the corner of my left eye. That was all the warning I got.

Screaming tires, honking horns, and severely cramped muscles are all that I remember afterwards.

I didn't get hit. The fellow in the lane to the left of me got that pleasure. However, I did end up being able to see all of the detail in up-close Hi-Def color and action right outside my open driver side window.

That close call made me forget about my petty worries and doubts. It put anything out of my mind except to note that I have been taking many things for granted.

As of now, I stop worrying about the things that aren't in my control. I deal with what I can, and make due with those things that I can't influence.

I resolve to enjoy the little things, cherish the great milestones, and make the most out of what I've been given.

To do any less is criminal, to my way of thinking.

Hope you think about this as well!

Ciao!

Thoughts..

Have you ever wondered how guys and gals can have a relationship, and NOT want to chop the other's head off at some point?



I mean, when you think about it, everything about a male and a female is diametrically opposed to the other.



Guys communicate more by doing than talking. We show our support by providing. We do things, and let our actions dictate our feelings.



Women? They talk. They talk about anything, and they talk about EVERYTHING. They talk about their hair, their clothes, their kids, their dreams, their job, their sex life, their therapist, yadda, yadda, yadda..



Granted, this is a generalization, and there are exceptions to this, but they are damned few and far between.



Let's talk about clothes!



For men, dressing up means wearing the jeans that DON'T have holes in them, a clean t-shirt with no witty sayings on it, and sneakers. Button-down shirt? Nah. Slacks? No way, this is a PARTY we're going to, not work! Loafers or Patent leather shoes? Only if the patent leather shines enough that we could possibly sneak a peek up a dress or skirt!



For ladies? Yeah, get two or three outfits out, ask the man his opinion, then ignore his suggestion, and wear what you were planning on wearing anyway. Then spend the next TWO HOURS applying makeup, hairspray, mousse, foundation, eyeliner, lipstick, mascara, hair curlers, hair straightener, perfume, etc. on. By the time you're done, the guy's gotta go wash his face, because he fell asleep in the easy chair, and has drool on the side of his face!



Shoes? For ladies, it's an addiction. What pair would look good with which outfit? Does this match the color of my eyes or handbag? Do they help to show off my pedicure and polish on my toenails?



For guys.. As long as they're comfortable, and we can wear the heck out of them, one or two pairs will do, thank you.



Food:



Yeah, I'm going there!



Girls, you totally confuse us on this one.



Let's start at the beginning. When a guy and girl date for the first time, she'll eat like a bird, hardly touch anything, and talk his ear off the entire time. He'll order what he usually would, and enjoy it. She'll take her leftovers home, and let them rot in the fridge, because she didn't really want the dish she ordered, but she doesn't want to seem ungrateful for the date.



Next, after getting to know each other better, a change happens. She'll actually start eating. However, this doesn't keep her from talking the entire time. So not only do us guys get to eat our food, but we get to see how yours looks too. The guy keeps up with the same thing. Order what you would normally, and try to keep the food pieces that could possibly fly from her mouth from landing on your plate.



Then they become an "item" or even get married. Then you find out this lady does something you never even considered: She eats ALL THE TIME. not big sit-down meals, but she's constantly snacking. Crackers here, a rice cake there, breakfast, a snack bar, a small doughnut, lunch, a candy bar, some Wheat Thins, a diet bar, Dinner, some ice cream, maybe a small slice of pie, a bag of popkorn.



It boggles the mind.



Shopping.



When I shop, I plan on what I'm going to get, know where I'm going, get in, get the stuff, and get out. Job done.



Girls?



Browse. Look over the price of this or that, this would look nice. Let's see what's in this store. I know we don't need anything here, but it would be nice to plan on a time when we might, so let's go in here and see what they've got. Try this on. Try that. What do you think that would look like in "x" room? Ad Nauseum. Can you tell that I HATE shopping? No? I'll tell you then. I HATE SHOPPING.



Yet for all of this, we are somehow able to look past this, and find someone that seems to match us. Our compliment. The other half of our being. The one who can finish your sentance before you even know you're talking about it. The Yin for your Yang.



I don't know how it happens, and I don't know WHY it happens. Yet the thing I find the most humorous about it all is this one simple fact:



The person we come to join with is one who you'd NEVER expect to deal with. They do each and every thing that you don't do, and yet somehow, instead of this being some kind of annoyance, it is something that you wind up cherishing that person for.

The same exact behavior that your brother does that can send you completely over the edge is something that you boast about to your friends because your wife did it..

The stuff that seems to melt your eyeballs to hear about is the stuff that you love when your girlfriend does it...

Nothing's as cute or as adorable when that significant other is at work. They could do something you've sworn you'd never deal with, and it becomes passable..

What is it about these unchecked emotions we've got that makes us more tolerant?

If we were to ever be able to harness the power of an emotion, then I'm sure quite a few of the "world problems" we've got going today would be taken care of.

The wars that we fight would cease, since we could promote tolerance for religious and racial differences.

The political arena would be less of a mess, since we'd be more tolerant of deciet and broken trust issues.

Wages would increase, and the cost of living would decrease, because we'd be wanting to help support and provide for each and every person we came into contact with...

The only real problem I have is that we'd also be wanting to screw each and every face we saw..

For some, that's not considered a "bad" thing.

For me, I'm just too old now to really enjoy it!

Have a great week, and a happy Mother's Day (early) for my lady readers!

Back, and with a new perspective!

Well, it's been a while since I've posted, and I'm not sure really where to begin here.

Things seem to be better at the house. We're not fighting, but yet there still seems to be a bit of tension running just under the surface. I don't know if this is just me, and I'm fooling myself, yet it really does feel like I'm playing with a tripwire I can't see, and the bomb it's connected to could go off at any moment.

However, until such time, I'll be willing to make things seem normal and stable if only for the sake of the kids, who were concerned about where things were going.

I'm also trying to see if taking more time to focus on my wife will help matters. Maybe I've been too self-absorbed, and haven't been spending enough time with her and tending to her needs.. Maybe we need to have personal getaway time each time the kids are at their mom's for the weekend.. Maybe I should focus more on what I love about her, instead of the things that irritate me..

Speaking of that, let me ask you all something.

As men, do you often wonder why ladies will complain about the things you do (and especially the things you DON'T do) when they get together? My wife and her two close girlfriends watch TV shows at our place on Tuesdays and Wednesdays on most weeks, and even though they try to be quiet, some of the conversation can be easily overheard, and I can hear them talk about such things. How he's doing this, and it bothers them. Or he's NOT doing this, and he really should. Why can't he do this, like she's seen other guys do? Et Cetera..

When I've been out with my guy friends, we will sometimes talk about our wives, but for the most part we avoid this. Why? Because we want to have a good time, and not have something possibly get back to the wife that we'll have to pay for later. Plain, simple, easy.

Ladies: Why do you feel the need to complain or compare your significant other to people? Why is it that just being a person isn't good enough? Are there times where you feel they just won't listen, and so talking about personal things with friends is going to better or help the situation?

Heh. Listen to me here. I'm complaining and asking for information from interweb folks about a subject that really kind of strikes me as being a bit oxymoronic...

Let's just say that I don't understand the need for comparison or complaint.

Yeah, there are times when I've found myself comparing my wife to other people. However, when I _do_ find myself doing this, I stop. I prefer to take my wife at face value. I appreciate the things she does, and I love her for the person she is, not the person she could become.

How about all of you? What are your thoughts?

**Bonus post!**

Today, I was just thinking about something else, and just had to talk about it on here, so you get a two-fer from me today!

This last week, I had an interesting thing happen between me and the kids.

Now, I'm one that feels that if my kids complete their homework, and get their chores done, there's nothing wrong with watching TV, or even getting some video game time in.

However, this time needs to be regulated when it comes to the Video Games..

Why do you ask?

Because my oldest is an addict, and if you let him loose, the younger two will never get a chance to play!

Now, on Monday, things were going well. My daughter got to her dance class, dinner went smoothly, and everything seemed to be on the up-and-up.

However, that was all to change near the end of the evening.

My youngest asked if they could share time in playing video games.

I wandered the house, and found that chores had been done, homework was finished, and even showers and PJs were done!

Now, impressed by the pre-emptive actions of my children, I gave the benign and benevolent nod, stating one condition to this:

Bean (my daughter) gets first crack, then Z (my youngest) gets to play. After they're done with their half-hour, then T (my oldest) can play.

They all consented to this, and huddled around to play the playstation to get their time in.

Bean get her time in, but during this time, she asked T to help her out on a section.

This is usually a mistake, as he then takes over control of the system. However, on this occasion, he did relinquish control after getting her where she needed to be.

Impressed at this observation, I then start cleaning house, and taking care of laundry, and the other mountains of housework that three kids can generate.

While out of sight and out of mind, another situation arose, and this time control WASN'T given back.

He then proceeded to play her game until her time was up, and then he booted up his own game, cutting his younger brother off from his chance to play.

Afterwards, I informed him that his actions would have consequences, but I wasn't going to lay down anything right then, because I was upset, and needed a cool head before dealing out any kind of punishment.

It just so happens that my chance for this happened in a doctor's office.

The next day, my daughter was playing in a soccer game, and she fell and hit her head pretty good.

She's a trooper, but she's just not got the coordination she needs. I mean, the first week of her softball season, she fell and broke her arm! If that wasn't bad enough, a week after getting the cast off, she fell off her bike, and broke the same arm again, but in a different place! Grace just isn't Bean's forte!

Anyway, while there, my youngest asked if he could play some playstation after we got back home. I gave him a yes, and he got all excited.

My oldest then asked if he could play, and I told him that I'd thought it over, and he was going to be grounded from the playstation for the rest of the week for abusing his time the night before.

Being all of 12, he then proceeded to argue with me about why this was a special circumstance, and why he had to take so long to play his game.

I refused to listen, and so he began to raise his voice. I crooked a finger at him with a slight scowl on my face. Coming over to me, he stood and waited for me to talk. I then informed him that instead of one week, it was going to be two for the backtalk.

Fuming, he then threw himself down into a chair, and proceeded to sulk.

Now, I'm not the saint, but I felt good about my decision.

I even felt more in control when I had two nurses pat me on the back while leaving the office because of the great way I had of disciplining my kids.

Now, I don't know about any of you, but is that really something special?

Is it so unusual for folks to use wisdom and patience to counsel a child instead of emotion and anger?

I don't know, but I do know that it works for me!

Have a great weekend folks!